...and then I forgot to hit "publish"

I wrote this at least a week ago, possibly a week and a half, and then I forgot to hit "publish". Distracted much?

It's been weeks since I really cooked, thanks to a combination of...stuff I can't remember...and being sick. So today, I ventured back into the kitchen, figuring it was high time I assembled a hot plate of food for TS, instead of the other way around.

Nothing fancy; just leftover chicken and potatoes. In an effort to keep things healthy, I grabbed a bag of green beans out of the freezer. And then... and then... I burned the green beans. Got so wrapped up in whatever I started to do that I couldn't even keep track of frozen green beans.

I even smelled them getting crispy, but figured it must be the fried chicken heating up in the oven. Not so! To my husband's credit, he agreed that a pat of butter was enough to cover up the burned taste, so dinner was saved. But still. Frozen vegetables??

It's not me, it's him

I've been completely useless in the kitchen this month. One day I did manage Kraft macaroni & cheese -- but that nearly went sideways when I put the knife in the refrigerator and came this close to putting the butter in the dishwasher.

Luckily, my awesome husband has picked up the slack, whipping up things like carne asada tacos, guacamole burgers (with homemade guacamole, natch), and pizza from scratch. He's also going to handle Thanksgiving, putting the turkey in the oven at 2 a.m. so we can eat when I get home from work.

As part of that holiday menu, he's going to make what I think will become a regular Thanksgiving dish in our house. It combines all the things you want in that day's dessert: a little pumpkin, a little chocolate, and a nutty meringue to impress your guests. And to make it even better, it's his own creation.

I give you: Troublesmith's Fall Pie.

YOU WILL NEED:
1 prebaked pie crust
1-2 large eggs
2 large egg yolks
1 large egg white
1/6 cup all-purpose flour
1 1/4 cup sugar
1/6 cup packed brown sugar
3/8 tsp. salt
1/4 cup (1/2 stick) unsalted butter
3/4 cups heavy cream
1 cup cooked pumpkin puree
1/2 tsp. vanilla
1 ounce unsweetened chocolate, melted & slightly cooled
1/2 tsp. ground cinnamon
1/2 tsp. ground ginger
1/4 tsp. grated or ground nutmeg
1/4 tsp. ground cloves
1/2 cup chopped walnuts, almonds, pecans or other nut

DO THIS:
Preheat oven to 425 degrees

Prepare pumpkin batter: In large bowl, whisk large eggs until smooth.
Add pumpkin, cream, 1/4 cup sugar, brown sugar, cinnamon, ginger, cloves and 1/4 tsp. salt. Mix thoroughly.

Pour pumpkin batter into prepared pie crust

Prepare fudge batter: In separate, large bowl, cream butter with remaining sugar. Beat in egg yolks & melted chocolate. Beat in flour and vanilla. Stir in nuts.

In separate, medium bowl, whip egg whites and 1/8 tsp. salt until stiff but not dry. Fold egg whites into fudge batter.

Bake pie crust with pumpkin batter for 15-20 minutes, until batter has firmed a bit. Remove from oven.

Gently transfer fudge batter to top of pumpkin batter with broad spatula. Gently smooth top. Return pie to oven.

Reduce oven temp to 325 degrees. Bake 25-35 minutes.

The Quince Answer (sort of)

For me, the jury is still out on quince. It definitely has a unique flavor, and I think I like it. But thanks to what seems to be an incorrect recipe and my own inattention, it was a little hard to tell.

Instead of getting a juicy roasted fruit from this recipe, what came out of the oven was more like quince mush. The recipe says to cook it for 5 to 7 hours. I checked the fruit at 2 hours, and it was definitely still hard. I checked again at 4 1/2 hours, and it was completely overcooked.

Despite the texture problem, though, the taste seems really lovely. I can see why it's so popular as a jelly or with roasted meat. TS describes it as a cross between a pear and a cranberry. That's not exactly right, but I can't think of anything closer.

So here are my notes on quince so far:

-Pay attention to the warnings about its raw texture. It is extremely hard, and I almost had a nasty slip with the knife.

-Also follow the directions to cut out all but the actual flesh. Every bit of core and skin that stayed on turned hard and knobbly.

-Raw quince is said to be bitter and astringent. Naturally, I had to try it. It didn't taste like much of anything, but this particular fruit had been sitting on my counter for a while, so that may be why.

-The cut fruit had a beautiful scent.

-The color change as it cooked was pretty cool. Mine turned into a jewel-toned rose, if that makes any sense.

Overall, definitely worth another go. I think I might try it in something savory next time. And I saw several recipes that suggested mixing quince syrup with prosecco...I think that would also be delicious.

If...then

If you decide to make this recipe: Glowing Jack-o-Lantern Cookies. And if your primary workspace is the counter over your dishwasher. Then you might not want to put the bag of crushed candy on that counter while you do the rest of the recipe.

Because the heat from the running dishwasher might cause the candy to melt into one giant lump, which is somehow much more difficult to smash up than the original candies. And if you're doing all this in the hour before you have to go work, the stubborn candy blob might make you late.

Theoretically, I mean.

Fluffy Pumpkin Muffins

Here's another reason to go snatch up pumpkins before they get replaced by Christmas trees. This recipe came on a muffin pan that my mother sent me (the muffins are pumpkin-shaped!); I have no idea what the name of the company is, so I can't tell you who to give credit to.

These muffins are very...fluffy. Almost more like a light cupcake. But they're tasty, so just go for it.

There's another pumpkin-ish recipe coming, dreamed up by TS. I'm not going to give anything away until he finishes writing it down. But trust me, you're going to want a pumpkin in reserve for that one.

And I have an answer to The Quince Question. Stay tuned.

Pumpkin Muffins

-3/4 c. butter, softened
-2 1/2 c. sugar
-3 eggs
-1 can (15 oz.) solid pack pumpkin OR 15 oz. pureed pumpkin
-1 c. buttermilk
-2 1/3 c. all-purpose flour
-1 Tbsp. pumpkin pie spice
-1 tsp. cinnamon
-1/2 tsp. ginger
-1 Tbsp. baking powder
-1 1/2 tsp. baking soda

Preheat oven to 350 F. Spray pan with baking spray.

In large bowl, cream butter and sugar until light and fluffy.

Add eggs, one at a time, beating well after each.

Combine pumpkin and buttermilk.

Mix rest of dry ingredients. Add to creamed mixture alternately with pumpkin mixture, mixing thoroughly.

Fill cupcake holders or cake pan 2/3 full.

Bake 12 minutes, or until toothpick comes out clean.

Cool in pan on wire rack for five minutes.

Remove from pan and cool completely.

The Great Pumpkin

Near the end of September, two adorable pumpkin "patches" set up shop down the street and immediately started calling my name. I wasn't feeling the urge to carve jack-o-lanterns this year, though, so I wasn't sure what I'd do with any pumpkins I brought home.

But then I had a genius idea. Seriously brilliant. All those yummy pumpkin recipes that pop up this time of year? What if I made them with -- wait for it -- fresh pumpkin???

I know. You're blown away.

When I pulled the roasted fruit out of the oven, I felt a combination of success...and embarrassment. I roll my eyes in the grocery store at pre-washed, shrink-wrapped potatoes for microwaving (how hard is it to wash a potato?), and yet I've always opted to buy a can of pumpkin puree rather than deal with its raw form.

Luckily, roasting a pumpkin and turning it into puree is ridiculously easy. Also luckily, I hear that smaller pumpkins are best for eating. More than enough excuse for me to bring home (ahem) three adorable pumpkins.

Two of them are serving as decoration until next week. The third was made into this.

I still haven't gotten around to making the frosting for the second recipe, because the cinnamon/sugar topping is delightful on its own. But if you try it, let me know how it turns out. That recipe includes another link to directions on pumpkin roasting, in case you're like me and think bright gourds are intimidatingly cute...

Quince Question

One of my favorite things about living here (probably second only to Disneyland) is the food. I love that our regular grocery shopping includes stores where I literally can't read half the labels. (The food is also fresh, tasty, and can be surprisingly inexpensive.)

My favorite store is called Jon's; it seems to market primarily to the Mexican and Armenian communities. I've turned shopping there into a sort of game: every time I go to Jon's, I buy one thing that I've never had before -- preferably something I've never even heard of.

Today, it was just something I've never actually eaten: a quince. They just looked pretty, in their green fuzziness, and I think it's high time I know what they taste like.

But I have no idea what to do with it.

So before I turn to the internet at large, I'm turning to (all four of) you. Have you had quince before? Do you eat it raw, or does it take some kind of preparation?

my bread doesn't taste like Kleenex

My first entry is a success, rather than a misadventure: I made bread! With my own hands!

It wasn't supposed to be made by hand. I fully intended to use my KitchenAid mixer, but it's broken. Whatever regulates the motor speed doesn't seem to work. I discovered this when I turned the mixer to "low" and it immediately kicked into high, throwing flour all over the counter and stove. (Oh, wait. There's the misadventure part.) Since I already had everything in the bowl, I had to do something with it. So I decided to bite the bullet and do what women have been doing for centuries: knead the bread by hand.

I grew up watching my mother bake bread, so you'd think I'd know what proper dough is supposed to look and feel like. Not so. I had Troublesmith read me the recipe very carefully while I kneaded and watched the timer, and mentally kept my fingers crossed the whole time.

I'd also miscalculated the amount of time it would take to rise (I missed the part of the recipe where it said to let the dough rise twice. TS put in a movie to keep me awake, and I got up every 30 minutes or so to check the dough (and later, the bread in the oven).

Three hours later, ta-da! Fresh, hot bread! It makes delicious toast, fantastic bread and butter (there's no better bread for butter than the soft, homemade kind), and my husband likes it so much that he even turned down homemade ziti in favor of a sandwich for yesterday's dinner!

The only thing I changed from the recipe was the last 20 minutes of cooking. The bread didn't seem to be getting the crust I wanted, so I upped the temperature to 400 degrees. Perfect.

http://smittenkitchen.com/2009/01/light-wheat-bread/

P.S. I chose the title for this post the day I started writing it; it's the punch line to something. Several days later, I can't remember the joke.